Saturday, August 20, 2005

Desert Museum and "uh tunnuh buttuhfloyz"

Today's excursion was to the Arizona-Sonoran Desert Museum. It is in the desert, but I wouldn't call it a museum. More like a hiking zoo. It was also warm, but not terrible. Unfortunately, "warm" meant that the coyotes and wolves didn't come out. We did get to see every other critter there, though. We even caught a glimpse of a prairie dog this time! The pictures are here, but as of this writing they haven't been organized nor have Deb's pictures been added.

We also got to experience the antics of another species. This happened at around 6pm, when the desert really comes alive. The animal in question is the Red-blooded Idiot (ignoramus ignoramus). We were fortunate (or unfortunate) enough to see two different sub-species. While enjoying the brightly colored flowers and multitude of butterflies at the butterfly garden, we heard the call of the New York Idiot (vinnicus goombaticus). They are extremely rare in Arizona, and are heard only during tourist season. This specimen was heard to cry out: "Hey! Dehs uh tunnuh buttuhfloyz ova heeyuh!" I've spent some time in the field, so I'm able to translate that into: "Hey! There's a ton of butterflies over here!" I couldn't help but laugh as soon as I heard that, because in my head I was hearing the follow-up statements: "There's a friggin' ton of air out here!" and "There's a ton of dirt on the ground!" This species can be counted on to remark upon the obvious at decibel levels that would drown out commercial airliners.

The other species of Idiot was encountered shortly after that. This was the sub-species Illiterate Fat Ass (no readicus butt hugeicus). This alpha female was heard to bellow "Which way are the hummingbirds?" to no one in particular. I suppose she didn't realize that her Death Star-sized ass was nigh-eclipsing the sign which read, in part, "< Hummingbirds". (Where the "<" denotes an arrow pointing the direction one would travel should one desire to see the hummingbirds.)

These and many more species were pouring in to the establishment as we were leaving. We were all glad they were travelling in the opposite direction.

It should be noted that we had some fascinating discussions regarding the different sub-species we had encountered. Punctuated with much laughter. Science at its best!

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